I typically say that my recent “awakening” happened at the beginning of 2019. What I’ve come to realize, though, is that it really all began in January 2018.
You can call it a spiritual awakening, or the deconstruction of my faith…whatever it was, I remember coming to a place much like Jacob did when he wrestled with the angel. (Genesis 32)
I came to a point where I didn’t want any person’s influence to be involved in my faith. Most of what I “knew” about God, I realized, had been taught to me by someone else. Scripture had been explained to me by someone else, be it a pastor, a teacher, or the commentators in my study Bible.
So, in January 2018, I put away all of my Christian books, (yes, even Oswald!) all of my novels, EVERYTHING except the Bible.
I started in Luke, and I spent the next 8 months reading only the Gospels and studying this man called Jesus. I didn’t read ANY other book of the Bible…just Matthew, Mark, Luke and John.
My friends, I’m not saying this to tell you what to do spiritually. But I am saying that doing this absolutely changed me. It was during this time that I felt compelled to write the blog. My story came pouring out of me as I was being changed from the inside out. Changed by what? Or who? Jesus!
Maybe it makes me a lunatic to believe it, but He is alive!!!! HE is the only reason we have the greatest gift imaginable—-reconciliation with God.
After my studies of the Gospels, I came to what felt like a dead end spiritually.
God.
I had been brought back to life and sent on a journey through the power of the Gospels, and that journey led me to God. My broken views of Him. My terror of Him. My avoidance of Him. My questions about Him. My anger towards Him. My lack of intimacy with Him.
I guess what I’m getting at is: the Gospel is alive and well, friends. Now, looking back at the past 2 years, it’s as if the whole story of redemption happened in my heart EXACTLY as it did 2,000 years ago. It starts with Jesus. I became His disciple, truly. And He led me straight to His Father. If you have truly been reconciled to God, you CANNOT remain the same.
So, I encourage you guys, my friends, the dear people who are following my crazy journey: Be reconciled to God. To do that, you must start with Jesus. Maybe you’ve believed in Him your whole life. Maybe it feels old. Maybe you’ve let the cares of this world blind you and drain the life from you.
Whatever it is, press into Jesus. Study His life, as a student who knows nothing and is willing to believe anything. Come humbly and alone. Leave behind either your complex theologies and belief, or your list of reasons why He can’t exist.
Start now. Today is the best possible day for reconciliation. It starts with Jesus. And let me tell you, you’ve never had a friend like this. The three of them…The Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit are REAL, alive, overflowing with love for you, and are brimming with power to bring your heart back to life. Maybe you’ll argue, “If He really loves me that much, He really is all-powerful, and He really does want reconciliation with me, why doesn’t He take the first step and show me that??!”
He already did. The crucifixion was the moment it happened. You can find a beautifully written and heart wrenching account of it in the Gospels of Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John. It’s the climax of the story He has written before the Garden of Eden. It’s when the way to Him finally became clear, and His hand could reach out and grasp ours. It cost God everything, and still He did it. It is the most beautiful tragedy. It started with the fall of man, and from that moment on, the Trinity worked together as one to redeem us. Now, we must reach back.
How do you start? SIMPLY. No church, preacher, priest, or rituals are needed. Pray with an honest heart. That’s what “coming to Him” really is…just talk to Him. After you’ve had the most honest conversation in your life with Him, open your bible and study Jesus Christ alone.
I’ll see you on the other side!